Does this title remind anyone else of a Whatchmacallit? Or make anyone want a candy bar, like me?
So today has been weird. Not weird in the Inception or Limitless kinda way—seriously, y’all, those movies were freaky. Especially the one with Leo Decaprio. I did not understand the hoopla behind that movie, because I hated it. Almost as much as I hated What About Bob (remember that one? Worst. Movie. Ever.)—but weird nonetheless.
And not for any particular reason. I’ve just felt off. A little…well, strange.
To begin the day, I opened my front door to send my third child off to school (he walks—the building is literally behind my house). And while I waved at him, my cat walked inside. Just strolled through the living room as if she didn’t have a care in the world, looked up at me like, “Where ya been?” and wandered over to her food bowl.
She’s been missing for two weeks.
What the heck? And what makes her think she can break curfew, show up unannounced, demand to be fed, and plop on the sofa for a nap like nothing has changed? I swear, if my kids ever pull this stunt I will be sooo ticked off.
Then, I bought groceries. Nothing unusual about that. But it took two shopping carts to make it to my car. And people were staring at me like, “Geez, eat much?” And this never happens. Like, never. But today, I’m pretty sure I could’ve shopped side by side with the Duggar family and beaten them on merchandise. And I’ve seen them at the store many times, all twentyish of them. And I’m not kidding.
Which now makes me poor. So that totally stinks.
Then, on the drive home, I was just bopping along to the music, minding my own business, when a box flew off the truck in front of me and stuck to my windshield. In case you didn’t know, it’s a little hard to drive with a box in your face. So pretty much the only thing I thought for five solid seconds was OmigoshOmigoshOmigoshOmigosh…
But it finally flew off. And somehow I stayed on the road. Which was a good thing since I had all that food in my car. And if I had to go back for more eggs I totally would have hunted that guy driver down and pummeled them at his head.
You toss a box at me, I’ll throw yolks in your face.
I think there’s a verse in the Bible about that somewhere. Though I’m not sure I just interpreted it right.
Then, I sat down to write this blog and I couldn’t think of anything, and I rarely have this problem. Normally, I am a woman of many words. (At least on paper. But stick me at a party with more than three people and I will go completely silent. I’m just not good in a crowd). But today, for some reason, I stared at the wall for awhile, my thought process going something like this:
“I guess I could write about…No. That’s boring.”
“Maybe if I started off with…Yuck. That’s not even funny.”
“Well, what if…Ugh. That’s stupid.”
So this is what I came up with. And I apologize, but it’s the best I got from my Nothing-Much-Has-Happened-But-A-Bunch-Of-Random-Stuff day.
Hope you’ve had a good one.