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I’ve been in a gripey mood lately, what with school starting and kids oversleeping and the daily nightmare of breakfast/lunch making happening full-speed at my house. Speaking of lunch, I really wish I could justify shoving a Lunchable in everyone’s sack and calling it good, but A. It would cost me a fortune, and B. I’m not sure the ham in those things is actually ham, and C. all four kids would want me to add stuff like chips and apples and a Personal Pan Pizza to the bag so what’s the point?

The work just never stops.

Like yesterday, papers came home from school and I signed my life away. I joined the PTA. Another PTA. The PTO. Sent in ninety bucks for choir, another thirty for school shirts. I scribbled my autograph on agendas. Filled out three “Tell us about your kid in two hundred words or less” forms (parent homework, which is totally unfair. Teachers will have my kids for nine months—surely they’ll figure them out eventually. And if not, *shrug*). I emptied backpacks and filled them back up, washed and dried smelly gym t-shirts and socks, located missing shoes that somehow disappeared on the walk between the front door and the refrigerator, refroze ice packs left in lunch boxes all day, and listened as two kids fought to be the first to read out loud newly checked-out library books. Reading out loud is so overrated, by the way (said the girl who writes books).

Anyway, I’ve been in a gripey mood. So today I decided to change it. To focus on the positive instead of all the school crap currently sucking the life out of me. So here we go.

Amy’s List of Things Making Her Happy Right Now:
1. It’s Friday.
2. We’re off school Monday, so it’s not only Friday, but it’s a THREE day weekend. A three day weekend that—thanks to the parents and in-laws—will revolved around food, drinks, and dessert. Woo!
3. Bread that I labored long and hard over is baking in my oven. Or that I tossed in my easy bread maker. Whichever.
4. I’m going to a movie today. It’s been awhile (even though I saw The Butler a couple weeks ago, but it was boring so I’ve decided it doesn’t count).
5. I will eat popcorn today.
6. I will drink Coke today.
7. My dog hasn’t pooped in the house in weeks.
8. Adam Levine is alive.
9. As is John Mayer.
10. And hey—I’m really liking this Sleeping with Sirens band/singer dude. Just an FYI…
11. A car that works (I’m cursing you in my mind, Volvo).
12. A house that’s clean (even if only marginally so).
13. I still have a tan.
14. It’s a three-day weekend. Did I mention that?

Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t, but I can’t write a blog post without mentioning the whole Miley Cyrus fiasco at the VMA’s. Now, I don’t want to trash her. Nor do I want to trash Robin Thicke (who has always seemed kinda used-car-salesman-like to me. Am I the only one who thinks so??) (so I guess I just trashed him a little). Anyway, I’m not here to knock either of them down. I’m just here to make suggestions for next year’s show. Because here’s the deal, no matter what anyone thought of Miley’s dance routine, there’s always room for improvement.

Like here’s an idea. Maybe she could do a routine like this. All thumbs. Zero twerks. No foam fingers. And waaaay better on the back.

Or here’s another. It’s peppy. Slightly jerky. But again…visits to a chiropractor would be minimal.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KPwzGzk2S0&feature=em-share_video_user

So there’s my ideas. VMA people, call me next year. I’m sure you tried this year, but my phone’s been acting weird lately. I can’t be totally sure, but it might be all the twerking routines I’ve been practicing and recording in my bedroom. My iPhone battery keeps running out during filming…

And now my back hurts.